The Raid 2 Berandal SPOILER FREE Review

The Raid reinvented action cinema and became, amongst the right people, THE film to know about and to have seen. Were there lots of precedents and already existing elements that went into The Raid? Of course but, much like the film it is often compared to, Die Hard, it is a film that has changed everything in the genre. For example, Sylvester Stallone saw it, realised Expendables 3 had to up its game and tweeted as much and although Hollywood is so slow and unimaginative that we'll see a Raid remake before we feel its influence in blockbuster fight scenes, you better believe it'll happen.

Gareth Evans though is a film maker that isn't going to wait around and isn't going to take some generic offer from Hollywood, just yet, when he can make a sequel in the same way they made the first film, by his own admission, in a 'creative bubble' with no one looking over his shoulder. I am sure if anyone did look over the shoulder of the man who wrote, directed, edited (on set and on the go!) and even helped choreograph The Raid 2: Berandal over the course of 6 gruelling months and on the jaw droopingly low budget of only $4.5 million, they wouldn't have a clue what was going on or what to say anyway. I know how they did some of the stunts and sequences and I still don't believe it!

The strength of The Raid 2, may also be its only weakness, which I will explain in a minute but basically The Raid 2 isn't anything like The Raid. Yes it follows on directly from the first film, stars the same person, has the same kind of awe inspiring fight scenes and the same limits testing, inventive camera work but in tone, story and pace it is very different. In attempting to describe it I have said it's both art house and grindhouse, action packed, comic book but dramatic, emotional, character and story driven, it's Donnie Brasco meets Hard Boiled, it's both utterly beautiful and violent, excessively gory and boundary pushing. Which is all tremendous but also leads to a long and unevenly paced film.
I definitely need to see it again now that I know what to expect and see if I still feel that way because, I have to say, during the first hour of the film because I was expecting, like a brainless idiot, The Raid again, I guess, I did find myself a little fidgety and, even, disappointed. This was entirely down to my expectation going in though and once the film hit its stride and started trying lots of different things I saw and appreciated what it was doing. So while, now, I perceive the pacing and tonal shifts to be a weakness, that might change and even if it doesn't, it's fantastic that Gareth Evans, Iko Uwais and co. tried something so different, second time out of the gate.

The Raid was criticised, by some utterly idiotic critics, for having little plot. I am sure the same critics thought of Evans as a one trick pony 'yeah the actions cute and everything but where's the character hmmmm' This is because most critics are ill-informed, humourless, action hating twats who hadn't bothered to see the excellent and full of plot, characters and drama, Merantau.  So, while the basic story of the script for The Raid 2 was actually written after Merantau and before The Raid, it still feels like Gareth Evans thought 'no plot eh? well I'll show you!' because the plot of The Raid 2 is so classic, so epic and so dramatic that, in some scenes, the fights can feel a little crow barred in actually, despite them all being driven by or furthering the plot.

I won't go into too much detail but basically our hero, Rama, in order to protect his wife and newborn son against the vengeance of the gangsters, whose business he effectively destroyed in the first film, begrudgingly becomes part of an undercover unit to weasel out corrupt police in the main Indonesian gang. This sadly means leaving his family in a safe house and getting himself purposefully arrested in order to get close to the son of the Indonesian crime boss Bangun, Ucok (Arifin Putra) while in prison. Meanwhile there has been peace for 10 years in the gang wars between the Indonesian crime family and the rival Japanese crime family, with each having and controlling their own defined territory. However a third party, Bejo (Alex Abbad) who has clawed his way up from nothing, decides to manipulate and eliminate his way into getting his own territory... and that's JUST the set up. There is SO MUCH more to it.

Normally I am not a fan of long movies. I think it's becoming a worrying trend. It's also difficult as movie theatres really don't have seats conducive to sitting that long. The Raid 2 is 150mins long and while there's definitely never a dull moment and I am not sure what more you would cut out, considering there are already 10 major deleted scenes apparently, I wouldn't usually advocate for that length of film. It has so much to cram in though and quite an intricate, part Shakespearean, part gangster epic plot that it definitely has plenty to do during that running time, not to mention the incredible fight/stunt sequences throughout.
So, to those fight scenes. Compared to the first they are bigger, have more people, more bloodletting, are more varied and are in many, many different locations. They are similar in that they are inventively choreographed and the camera and the fighter entwine constantly, like an omnipresent combatant and supporter, in such a pleasing and innovative way that it is both not immediately noticeable and would make my head spin if I had to work out or plan anything that intricate. During the spectacular car chase, the use of multiple operators risking life and limb at speeds of up to 60mph to get the effect that the camera comes out of one car window, floats down the road and then into the car behind it is absolutely jaw dropping.
Also for people, like me, who were watching the film and could completely, mentally appreciate the changes from the first film but were also waiting just for Iko Uwais to be completely unleashed on some people in a series of awesome kick ass scenes one after the other, like the first film, have no fear, the climax does NOT disappoint!
There is plenty of blood flying around in the film as well and, certainly in terms of gore and single, shocking violent moments, it certainly felt more brutal in places than The Raid. It is absolutely on the edge of a very hard R. To be honest, if this gets an R, why even bother having an NC-17.

The acting and the writing are also expanded upon in the second film with Iko Uwais, especially, playing a wonderfully angry, downtrodden, confused at times and sad at times version of Rama that shows so much depth of character in-between the frenetic fighting. Rama is not just the focus though in this film and all the characters have their moment. They have fleshed out motives, understandable reactions and there's twists and shocks aplenty.
I was talking earlier about a clash of styles and I described the film as a gangster epic, Shakespearean and even comic book like, well this is reflected in the characters, the set design and the cinematography.
The characters range from a serious, quietly spoken Yakuza boss played by Ken'ichi Endô, to the anxious, fiery tempered, ambitious, upstart son, to even a Manga like assassin duo with hammers and a baseball bat respectively, as their stylised weapon of choice.
The terrific sets range from gritty, shot-on-location streets, buildings and alleyways to meticulously designed apartments, offices, a banquet hall and a jail.
Likewise, the cinematography is one moment, still, specific, beautiful, slow and focussed and the next minute handheld, frantic and insane.
It's a film maker and his crew not resting on their laurels or repeating previous glories but instead using all of their abilities to produce a rich, varied and enjoyable film. It's diverse but understandable, it's crowd pleasing and thought provoking and it's massive, visual and jaw dropping while having moments of quiet, desperate, emotional intimacy.

Has some of the surprise of the first film dissipated? a little but not entirely and does it totally reinvent the game again? not at all and, if anything, is more traditional than the minimalist, relentless first film but both as a sequel and as a film on its own, it's an incredible piece of work. Incredibly assured, incredibly entertaining and incredibly inventive. It can now be added to the list and sit proudly next to The Godfather 2, Evil Dead 2, Aliens etc.

If you love action, gangster films or Asian cinema then make sure you watch this at least twice when it shows up in cinemas on the 11th of April.
- The Kick Ass Kid

Sabotage SPOILER FREE REVIEW

Sabotage is a gritty crime action thriller co-written and directed by David Ayer and starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sam Worthington, Terrence Howard and Olivia Williams along with TV hunks Josh Holloway and Joe Manganiello.
It is also, on the surface, an unusual film for Schwarzenegger who, despite a slate of upcoming sequels to his former big hits or franchises, is in the middle of a really interesting comeback. The criminally underrated Last Stand saw him try a little bit of an Eastwoodish turn as the old, tired, grizzled sheriff of a small town but still with all the humour and over-the-top action that used to be his stock-in-trade, Escape Plan saw him having tremendous fun in a bravado performance and stealing the film in his supporting role and in the upcoming Maggie he will be dipping his toe into the bloody and crowded waters of zombie films but with Sabotage it appears to be a first for Arnold: a, mostly, dramatic, serious performance, leading an ensemble cast, with, comparatively minimal action.

Arnie plays a tough as nails but quietly haunted and lost DEA Agent, whose special team of hard training, hard fighting, hard drinking and hard talking undercover agents are divided by an incident and investigation surrounding a missing ten million dollars. This fills the team full of mistrust, which only grows as they, individually, start showing up dead in a series of brutal, unflinching and hard R murders. Schwarzenegger must team up with Fed Olivia Williams and work out just what the hell is going on.

Sabotage is a film that is all about appearances. It appears to be a grainy, dark, violent and adult crime film which pulls no punches with language, nudity and gore but aspects of the plot are as generic as your favourite 80s or 90s revenge action film. We are told that Arnold's team are the best at what they do but we don't really ever see that as they appear to just be a bunch of loud mouth, alcoholic hotheads who happen to be armed. They also all appear to be innocent but maybe there's something else going on!
It's, also, a film that appears to be taking cliches from the past and turning them on their head and a film that appears to be clever, full of twists and reveals but, a few minutes out of the cinema, you have more questions than answers and any logic the script has falls away pretty quickly.
This, normally, in a wham bam, 80s throwback, action film wouldn't matter but structuring it the way they have and presenting it the way they have, demands you look into it a little closer and, when you do, it doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

One of the good things about the movie was definitely the fact that, from the trailer, I thought it would have that shaky-cam, grainy-video style cinematography that sadly passes for so-called "realism" these days and is meant to signal you're watching something edgy and serious but it didn't. The cinematography was pretty good and the action scenes, particularly, were clear, pleasing and watchable. There were a couple of moments where the camera would suddenly and needlessly be mounted on top of a gun or something silly but apart from that, very cool.
Another thing was Arnie and Olivia Williams performances, while the chemistry between them never really materialised like maybe the script called for it to, he has presence by the bucket load and she has the acting chops, so that you were always pleased when the film followed them.
Lastly it's violence and gore is joyously hard R, in your face, unflinching and even, at times, shocking. I wish it was attached to more enthusiastic and pleasing action sequences but that it was there at all, was a surprise.

Sadly though the movie has a lot of faults and I hate to write or report this as I really do think Arnie fans, action fans and thriller fans should go and see it, if for no other reasons but to make your own mind up and to see the Austrian oak do something very different in tone at least, if not in story. However, a couple of hours detached from the movie now and I just wish they'd told the story differently or it had been a different story. While I applaud anyone trying to come at generic material a different and new way, I don't think this did it successfully. There's a reason this kind of story has been told differently in the past, it's more satisfactory that way. Also it's full of plot holes which are covered only by the fact that, because we are meant to suspect everyone in the film, no one really has any kind of character to speak of. Their motives aren't quantified, explained or examined beyond very basic assumed reasons.
The second reason Sabotage is not the success or the film I hoped it would be, is that the team around Arnie are all arse holes and while Sam Worthington's character displays a little sensitivity and tragedy, quite well I might add, most of the time they are all obnoxious, swearing, ego fuelled, bickering imbeciles. I couldn't believe one of them had any more elite training than a low paid mall security guard and even if they did, not one of them seems to respect it. I understand the team in the film is meant to be divided by mistrust and devastated by the deaths of their team mates but there are more scenes of them visiting titty bars and drinking their body weight in booze than there are scenes of them kicking ass and taking names, which is a real shame and also annoying and grating.
Lastly, the film is also horribly misogynist. I can't, exactly, go into all the reasons why here but there aren't many glowing representations of women in the film, most of them are drug addled, whores or strippers. Not that the men are likeable and perfect either but they don't get anywhere near the bad representation that women do in the film. It thinks it combats this claim by having Olivia Williams' seemingly strong, intelligent character in there but it really doesn't once you see what happens.

None of these niggles, of course, have to matter. Despite all this stuff, I did enjoy the movie for what it was and it's definitely an interesting film for Arnie to have in his come-back cannon. It's nothing like I was lead to believe from the trailer though and it's not as clever as it thinks it is but disengage your brain and just go with it and there's a ton to enjoy. It's my least favourite of his films since 2010 though.
- The Kick Ass Kid

Dark Vengeance SPOILER FREE

We here at Dr.Action and the Kick Ass Kid headquarters, in conjunction with our parent site www.aftermoviediner.com, were very happy to get a preview copy of, one of our favourite action men, Steven Seagal's latest film Dark Vengeance. Set to hit Redbox and VOD services today Thursday, February 27th.

If the truth be told, rather than being a feature film, this is actually 2 episodes of his TV Show, True Justice, edited together. It is a part 1 and part 2 of the same, on going, serial killer storyline though so it sort of works, despite there being no traditional character introductions or setting exposition that might  have helped for folks not familiar with the continuing adventures of Elijah Kane (Steven Seagal) and his band of bland CSI: Miami wannabes.

Imagine True Justice the series as a sort of CSI: Seattle but filtered through the fascinating brain of Steven Seagal and you can sort of imagine the look, feel and sound of Dark Vengeance. Sadly Seagal rarely whips his glasses off, stares just off camera and utters some punning bon mot on the discovery of a body. He does get some pretty terrific Seagal style, semi-philisophical one liners though, which are sure to please fans of the man.

The plot centres around a tough-to-catch serial killer that has been bumping off strippers in a way that seems to link the deaths to Chinese mythology. As the bodies stack up, Kane sends the two female members of his team under cover at a PG rated strip joint with the hope of setting a trap for this, slowly becoming, mass murderer. However all is not as it seems when Kane apparently captures and shoots the man responsible only for the killings to continue...
Along the way Seagal stops off to natter Asian healing techniques, herbs, mystical balms and mythology with his friend Chen, play some distorted blues guitar and occasionally shoot someone or beat someone up, even if it's not always entirely apparent why any of this is happening.

Also, along for the ride, is the cameoing George Takei as the not particularly helpful and stater of the obvious medical examiner in the police morgue.

When the action is happening Seagal proves he can still aikido his way out of a convenient plot contrivance or shoot his way into a pleasant diversion. His hands are seemingly as quick as ever and when it comes to staging a lean, mean shoot out, he's your man. The serial killer plot, too is pretty good, even if bodies are seemingly racking up on a daily basis with no useful clues to further an investigation, which becomes a little repetitive. The acting from the supporting cast is serviceable and rarely grating although you can't imagine they were given much to work with. The big man himself, Steven Seagal does that whispery thing he does with that ever evolving accent, including referring to his team as the POleese (police). It's fun to watch, if sometimes a little hard to hear exactly what words of wisdom he's attempting to depart. He has presence though, I'll give him that.

There are a lot of wild liberties taken with the law and police procedure, as you'd expect and seemingly there are no official repercussions for Kane's lax and violent approach to his job. This would all be fine if the story justified it in any way but then you're always welcome for some gun play or fisticuffs as, when they happen, sporadically, it reminds you why you were here in the first place. ACTION.

The main problem is two episodes of a TV show, while maybe having the same running time, do not have the same pacing, momentum or structure of a feature film. They essentially, or normally, would have a three act structure condensed to 45mins with a cliff hanger/twist ending. This means that Dark Vengeance has 6 acts, a twist and apparent wrap up in the middle of the film and then a lead up to the next episode/film at the end. Watched, however, with prior knowledge of the series and I imagine this is a lot clearer and maybe more enjoyable.

While I am not, personally, a fan of the flash cuts and close ups of the transitions that typically appear in police procedural shows in the US these days, the rest of the scenes are filmed ok and with, at least, a definite eye to some stylistic set dressing and lighting. The director, Keoni Waxman does his best work with Seagal, however, in 2012's Maximum Conviction.

So the plot's a bit all over the place, the final villain a bit laughably obvious and you'll have a tough time of it if you're not familiar with the TV Show but it has some amusing one liners and some sadly occasional but top-notch fighting and shooting. Probably only for hardcore Seagal fans but not one to miss if you are.

- The Kick Ass Kid

Grudge Match, let's talk about how GREAT Stallone is and why critics are wrong, AGAIN!

SPOILER FREE
Far from being some silly comedy based on the Rocky meets Raging Bull gimmick, this was a well scripted, well performed film about men, age, skill, passion, regret and dignity that, also, happens to be hilarious.

The only negative for me was the unimaginative, slow paced direction and editing. With someone who actually believed in the material and had a bit more visual flair and a marketing team that had any skill and this film would've been perfect.
Kevin Hart and Alan Arkin are consistently hilarious and the emotional story lines DeNiro and Stallone have to carry are maybe cliche but always engaging, never overly sentimental, always understandable and from a very manly perspective - few words and whole shed load of meaning. When you throw in some fun training montages, a great end fight, DeNiro being the funniest he's been since Midnight Run and a few welcome, but never heavy handed, in-jokes you have a solid, decent, enjoyable film that more people should see and enjoy but probably won't.

As for Stallone, why is it critics are shitting on all of his movies? they portray him as a rangeless, emotion-less, slab of no good, idiotic meat and they can barely even bring themselves to acknowledge his action prowess unless in a derisive or ironic way. They criticise his acting, his looks, his speech - everything! but Stallone is terrific in Grudge Match. Utterly believable, charming and matches DeNiro beat for beat in the acting stakes. You say he has no range but was he playing Rocky? No! was he playing Rambo? No! was he playing Barney Ross? No!
Critics should watch old films occasionally and remind themselves that their set-in-stone, out-dated, stereotypical and lazy opinions about some actors are wrong. Al Pacino is mostly always Al Pacino, same with DeNiro and more-often-than-not Nicholson, go further back and Mitchum, Bogart, Stewart, Grant etc. all were GREAT but all had onscreen personas. Well so does Stallone but he's not always the same, any more than any of those other actors I just mentioned. No he's not Daniel Day Lewis, thank god! That guy puts on a fake beard, stoops over slightly, talks in a funny voice and people think he's a genius (misguided fools!) but Stallone is a strong, interesting actor and Grudge Match gives him some scenes to show that off. It may well be his single best straight performance roll since Cop Land.

Most people who go to see this film won't take away from it what I did and that's a shame but even if you don't, if you can look past the somewhat slow pace and inept editing, there's at least a good man-centric comedy there that never has to resort to gross-out or infantile humour to get a big belly laugh.
This movie got made because it has a cracking script, the Rocky/Raging Bull thing was just a bonus.
- The Kick Ass Kid

'Homefront' Review SPOILER FREE

The ever prolific Jason Statham is back for his third film this year! First it was Parker, then Redemption/Hummingbird and now, finally, the Sylvester Stallone penned Homefront, based on the book by Chuck Logan.
My reviews of his earlier outings this year were full of pride and praise for the guy who, despite harsh, incorrect criticism and rarely stella box office, continues churning out diverse, yes I said it, diverse films.
This time round please take that as read because, actually, in Homefront, Statham has delivered his most throwback, recognisable and just down right enjoyable action film of the year. While the junkets and interviews for this have tried to emphasise the emotion in the story, Statham showing vulnerability as a father and talk of The Man Who Is The Stath trying something different, actually this is the one movie this year that he's made that is just a straight up, old school, action film.

When the movie starts we see undercover agent Stath's last case gone bad when his delicate work undercover with a biker gang is shattered by the heavy and messy hand of the DEA. He resigns, his wife gets sick and dies and so his daughter (Izabela Vidovic) and him move to the Louisiana countryside that his wife loved so much. He hasn't been there long when trouble at the daughter's school escalates into confrontations with the local, strung-out hillbilly woman (an almost unrecognisable Kate Bosworth) and her no good, dentally challenged, lank haired man. Bosworth happens to be the sister of the local nut job meth dealer Gator (James Franco), who is unceremoniously banging an ex druggie biker chick (Winona Ryder) who,     in turn, happens to know the old biker gang who still hold a massive grudge against our musclebound, monosyllabic, balding hero.
The stage is set for all hell to break lose and for The Stath to do what he does best and clean house. Throw in a crooked but charming sheriff (The always welcome Clancy Brown), the dependable, one good man in a hick town, best friend (Omar Benson Miller) and the beautiful, red headed, more than perfect, school psychologist (Rachelle Lefevre) and you've got yourself a damn enjoyable, by the book, nostalgia tinted, kick ass action movie.

If you've seen and loved Walking Tall or Road House then you'll like this. In fact I had to chuckle when I heard the name he was using, at the beginning, as an undercover biker. You'll see what I mean...

Much has been made of the script being written by Sylvester Stallone, you know because short-term memory critics forget the man has written a ton of screenplays, was Oscar nominated and developed three of the most successful franchises of all time, but, here, again,  he shows that he hasn't lost his touch. Stallone writes relatable, human and enjoyable, kick ass entertainment and he does it almost better than anyone else. That's what you get here, some pretty decent character moments, some recognisably entertaining and enjoyable interactions, the odd cool one liner and action on and off through out.
There is a pause in the middle to allow for character and plot development, some father and daughter bonding scenes and a nice sense of building tension for the third act fight but Statham dispatching some lunk headed rednecks is never far away.

As for the action we get a couple of car chases, some old fashioned fisty cuffs and even an enormous explosion. Statham is an old pro at this stuff and, thankfully, there isn't too much shaky cam-itis or heavy handed editing to ruin his masterful handling of the rough and tumble, although, ideally I'd prefer my fight scenes with no added style or flash from, overly twitchy, DPs at all.
The direction from Mr. Old-reliable, Gary Fleder (Kiss The Girls, The Runaway Jury) is absolutely fine. He captures everything with the minimum of fuss and you're never unsure of what is going on. I imagine it would be difficult to make Louisiana look ugly but Fleder and his DP do their best to really make the surroundings pop with colour and texture.

As for the acting, the mad hodgepodge of a supporting cast do their roles pretty damn well actually. Kate Bosworth stands out in her role of the tweaker sister and it's by far the best she's been in anything I've seen her in. Franco is good, he doesn't overplay it and while he lacks overall menace and is clearly a bit out of his depth, he does his best to portray the strung out Gator as a ruthless, wasted loser who could snap at any minute. Winona Ryder doesn't have a ton to do and neither does Rachelle Lefevre but Clancy Brown and Omar Benson Miller are effortlessly enjoyable and welcome whenever they're on screen.

Statham is his usual strong self, with maybe even less to say in this than in his normal roles and while he seems comfortable and it's never jarring, he does, sadly, lack great chemistry with Izabela Vidovic, the girl playing his daughter. Which is odd because in Safe he formed a very real and pleasing on screen bond with the girl in that. It is not that Izabela is no good, either, because she's a great little actress and they do have some affecting scenes together, it's just not 100% believable, not that it has to be for the film to work.

So, for all of you who don't believe Statham does anything but the same character in the same film, hopefully 2013 has proved you wrong, if it hasn't, Homefront is hardly going to go any further to change your mind, that being said, if you watched Parker and Redemption and longed for some of the wham bam, throw back days then Homefront should help stop that craving.
For me, personally, I like them all. If I had to rank his last three it would be Redemption, Homefront and then Parker but there's really very little between them. They're all damn cool.

Long may Statham continue.
- The Kick Ass Kid

Battle of the Damned

Saturday night I went to the 'Day of the Undead' Zombie film festival in my hometown of Leicester UK. I do love a good zombie flick, but this year it had an added bonus, Battle of the Damned which is, basically, Dolph Lundgren vs Zombies.
The organiser, Zombie Ed, told us that the film company behind the movie said, “if you don’t like the sight of Dolph running around killing zombies, you’re dead inside”. Well was he right?

The basic premise is simple, Dolph plays Max Gatling, a private soldier hired to go into a cordoned off city to find the daughter of a multi millionaire. When most of his crew are killed off by the zombies, who are marauding through the city, Dolph sets off on his own to find the girl, not getting on the chopper sent in to take his group to safety. Dolph now must find the girl before the city is destroyed by the missiles attempting to wipe out the zombie infection.
Will he find the girl, get her to safety and any other survivors??

Lundgren still has it, his running shows his age, but it doesn’t stop him high kicking zombies in the face. His acting has gotten so much better over the past few years, he really is excellent, as are all the cast, everyone is pretty good, better than some acting you usually see in some lower budget movies.
Oh and Dolph teams up with robots, yep ROBOTS. The mood in the cinema watching this was fantastic, nobody was dead inside, seeing Dolph kick, stab and shoot zombies was an awesome sight, very fun and well made.
The only problem really was the old problem with action movies, in that the director really needs to hold the camera still! it goes all over the place! But overall its still a GREAT fun action horror. With zombies AND ROBOTS!!!!!
'Day of the Undead' has been running for a few years now and is always a great day for zombie fans, for more information go to www.terror4fun.com, its creator can be found on twitter @zombieeduk.
- Dr.Action

ESCAPE PLAN

So it is finally here and despite my high hopes, Escape Plan opened to shitty box office and mediocre reviews. It was nice to see, however, critics were less snobby and had less of their head in their arse than when it came to earlier action films The Last Stand and Bullet To the Head.

The film, like the trailer showed, is basically about Stallone's character, Ray Breslin who is an expert at breaking out of prisons. He runs a company with, clean-freak, Vincent D'Onofrio and, his cohorts in the getting out of clink business, Amy Ryan and Curtis '50 Cent' Jackson. They test the security loop holes in maximum security jails for the government.
When Sly is double crossed and winds up in 'The Tomb', a seemingly, impenetrable, hi-tech fortress run by butterfly-fancier, waistcoat stroking and dead-eyed company man Jim Caviezel, he forms an unlikely partnership with bearded Arnold Schwarzenegger and some others around him, to break out and get revenge. Throw in an odd 'wait is that Sam Neil?' cameo and bullet headed, rubber suited-rent-a-guard Vinnie Jones and you have yourself the sort of high-concept storytelling and set up for kick ass fights and explosions that we just don't get enough of anymore.

It's a strong plot, an awesome set up and the script is pretty good by similar, action film standards. The supporting cast, possibly the oddest mix of character actors and c listers ever assembled outside of a bad 2000s Christmas movie, veer wildly from being very dependable to odd and interesting, sadly taking in bland and awful any time Ryan or Jackson are on the screen. Ryan's banter back n forth with Stallone, in particular, is creaky and painful but the fault may lie, equally, with the slow and sloppy editing (more on that later).  I am not sure what Jim Caviezel is doing but he has decided that daintily painting a dead butterfly or slinking around in a tailored three-piece spitting out lines in a way that, I suppose, is meant to be threatening but comes off like he's being all sultry and trying to tongue fuck the leads, equals a cool and mesmerising villain. It doesn't quite but it's ok, passable and suitable to the genre at hand.

What you've really come to see though and what doesn't disappoint is Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Scwarzenegger. Watching them on the big screen is an unrivalled joy. That critics dismiss them and audiences ignore them is a crushing shame. People can't see past the baggage of their former careers and want to make every new film they do some how a comment on that, a throw back to that or unfairly compare it to the 'good old days'. This is to do Escape Plan, Bullet To The Head, The Last Stand etc. a massive disservice. Both of them still have the action ability, the star charisma and the acting skill in bucketfuls. I even think Schwarzenegger is a better actual actor now than he was in his heyday. In Escape Plan he imbues his character with a wonderful sense of humour, mischief, energy and intelligence that's not on the page. In Escape Plan they play real rounded characters with little to no nodding or winking at the camera and it's an absolute pleasure to see them work together both as actors on the screen and as characters in the story. Schwarzenegger has the bulk of the showy/stand-out scenes and Stallone does the running, climbing, punching dependable guy with sorrow and intelligence behind those famous heavy eyelids.

Then you get to the action. It's a little unfortunate that this film packs 90% of its gleeful, old school, shoot 'em up, beat 'em up, crash bangery into the last 20mins but when it arrives it is enjoyable, air punching, explosive moment after moment. It doesn't let up and it delivers like a milkman with a huge erection and a pint of cold cream. How can you hate on a film where Arnie tears an enormous gun off a helicopter, turns round in slow motion and fires off a thousand bullets into a group of electronic-sex-gimp looking, futuristic prison guards? it's simply not possible.

The reason Escape Plan doesn't quite hit the highs it might have done, is solely at the feet of the director. There simply aren't many good action directors working today and if you wondered if the future of action was Mikael Håfström then sadly not. While not the worst offender Håfström just can't film a hand to hand combat scene as successfully as you would like and, also, his pacing leaves a lot to be desired. While I understand he has Rambo and The Terminator in a film together and probably felt intimidated to fuck, the film could just do with being tighter and more interesting/exciting through the first two thirds of the film. Think Sodderburgh's Ocean's Eleven, Sam Raimi's The Quick and the Dead or Robert Rodriguez's anything! All could've made some of the clunkier, earlier scenes really zing off the screen and with some judicious editing and a cinematographer that was awake and alert, who knows what could've been accomplished.
Ultimately, though, I settled in and the direction didn't really bother me because once Arnie and Sly get together, they grab the film, run it right down the pitch and score a big touchdown with it, laughing and firing guns in the air all the way.

While Escape Plan was not the tightly wound, action filled classic I was hoping for, it was a solid, enjoyable and entertaining film which delivered enough that I left the cinema shadow boxing and giddy as a school boy full of pudding. I put it on a par with Bullet To The Head and just behind The Last Stand for 2013 action films.

The disappointment is that because of audiences being 12 and idiots we might not get to see the likes of these enjoyable for enjoyments sake, throwback action movies much longer, so, if you're like us and you're a fan PLEASE go support this and others like it whenever and however you can.
- The Kick Ass Kid